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10 Ways to Support The BDS Against Israel…come on Jew hating scum, time for you to put your money where you mouth is

Been wondering how to effectively boycott Israeli products? We’re here to help with this totally unbiased list of things you should avoid at all costs.


Don’t worry, Israel doesn’t contribute that much to the world. It’s really only the fields of technology, medicine, agriculture, entertainment, navigation, transportation, health, military, archaeology, and information that are deeply impacted and shaped by Israel.

Here’s what you should stop using immediately to support the Boycott, Divestment and Sanctions movement.

1. Cell phones

Yeah, you heard me. That lifeline you carry in your pocket, the little device that basically functions as an external human brain? Better toss that thing in a lake, my friend, because mobile phone technology was developed in Israel by Motorola, which has its largest development facility there.

What does this mean? No more texting cat memes, no more skimming your Facebook feed during a bad date, no more dodging calls from your crazy aunt in Milwaukee (okay, that last one may be a nice fringe benefit). Can anyone even remember life before cell phones? If you can’t, you can support BDS and find out soon enough!


2. Antivirus software

Get ready for a bona fide infestation, because protective technology like antivirus software and firewalls were developed in Israel too. That means no emails from unknown sources and definitely no streaming or sketchy websites allowed, or your computer will start to resemble that tumor-covered Orc dude from LOTR. Ick.


3. USB flash drives

Like traveling light and having a conveniently tiny info transport mechanism right there on your key chain? Too bad! These were developed by Kfar Saba-based M-Systems, an affiliate of IBM, who have pioneered the world of flash memory. Guess you’ll have to start using your brain memory instead…that’s not terribly fallible, is it?


4. Waze

If you’ve been relying on the wildly popular GPS app so accurate it is a staple of military operations and other human drivers in more than 100 countries, you’ve been supporting Israel. Do they still make Thomas Guides? Let’s hope so. On the plus side, you’ll never have to visit your crazy aunt in Milwaukee again because you won’t be able to find her.


5. Walking

..for paraplegics, that is. Israeli company ReWalk created this bionic tool for allowing those who can’t use their legs to, well, use their legs. It is used in the U.S. and Japan, among others, to allow patients to stand, walk, and even climb stairs, bringing them countless steps closer to leading fully mobile lives. It was even featured on an episode of Glee. But hey, who needs walking, right?



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